Da Coconut Repablik

A Chronicle of the Da Pinoys and Da Coconut Repablik of Da Pilipins

Da Kris Aquino Fiasco

After my graduation and our JS Prom which had ended the chapter of high school life , I took a short break from the country’s affairs and now this is the right time to break my silence regarding the fiasco of the Queen of Media Kris Aquino. The issue is purely a private family matter.

So a private life of an artist is making headlines everyday in our television screens every night. Why? Because fuck Sabah and the lunatics dying in the plantation of an obscure area in the middle of nowhere. Fuck also the volunteers who want to blow their brains off in Sabah.

Fuck the CBCP’s stupid dogma and its pro life stance. Fuck the incompetence of our government in almost all aspects in governing the country.  Fuck also our flawed education system. The news about Kris is more important!

Our local media pays more attention to the individual lives of public figures and celebrities and it is a norm. We cannot blame them, after all unless they will run out of stupid, gullible crowd who will buy their tabloid journalism, they will be forced to stick into facts and real news. Our culture of gossipers and the lack of common sense and rationality of most individuals residing here make the  mundane lives of celebrities to a national importance.

It is like a tradition for our ‘journalists’ to be biased and to inject more showbiz into the daily news even though it makes no sense. But hey at least we can make fun of those blokes like Kris Aquino. I have read some of the articles about the fiasco and she is a great actress that can manipulate the public opinion easily to her side. She did it several times. When she said that she will quit showbiz, I heaved a sigh of relief thinking that it is not a publicity stunt.

So I will post an article from GMA News. You can read the full hilarious article in the link provided for your pleasure:

EDITOR’S NOTE: A recent tiff between celebrity host Kris Aquino and former husband James Yap has provoked an avalanche of responses on social media and the Pinoy blogosphere. 
Kris, in a petition, also asked a Makati court for protection after Yap allegedly tried to “overstep his boundaries and of attempting to seduce her while visiting her home, and of inflicting psychological harm on their son Bimby.” The celebrity host also accused Yap of hurting her in December last year “as if he was still entitled to his matrimonial rights.”
In an interview with Jessica Soho on GMA News TV Thursday night, Kris said she has decided to resign from all her current shows and was planning to leave the country over the weekend.
I want Kris to be in Europe permanently, but no the fucker will return to televise her stupid shows again. You can read the Rappler article below:

MANILA, Philippines – Despite Kris Aquino’s declaration on national TV that she would quit showbiz, ABS-CBN has announced that the TV host will stay on her programs in the Kapamilya network.

Aquino currently hosts a talk show called “Kris TV” aside from starring in primetime soap “Kailangan Ko’y Ikaw” and judging the reality talent search “Pilipinas Got Talent.”

On March 23, Bong Osorio, head of ABS-CBN Integrated Corporate Communications, said in a statement that network executives will meet with Aquino when she returns to the Philippines from a trip to France with her son James “Bimby” Yap Jr.

Two days before the trip, Aquino was interviewed on “TV Patrol” during which she announced she would be resigning from all her shows to take care of her son in the face of recent conflict with former husband James Yap.

The 42-year-old star said on air, “I’m giving up my shows. Hindi ko sinasabi ‘yan just so that I can say na I’m the one making the bigger sacrifice. Tinatalikuran ko ang mundo na kinilala ko na bumuhay sa akin dahil higit doon sa karera ko, mas mahal ko ang anak ko (I’m not saying that just so I can say I’m the one making the bigger sacrifice. I’m turning my back on the world of my career because more than my career, I love my son).”


But Osorio maintained in the ABS-CBN statement that “upon her return, Kris will fulfill her commitment to her soap ‘Kailangan Ko’y Ikaw,’ which is nearing its end.”

“She will also have to stay as [a] judge in ‘Pilipina Got Talent’ till its end in June. Being a foreign franchise, there are commitments we have to fulfill and rules we need to abide by,” he added.

As for “Kris TV,” Osorio said the next episodes had already been taped in preparation for her vacation in France.

However, Osorio did not confirm that Aquino will tape any more episodes of the show after her return.

On March 20, Aquino was granted a temporary protection order (TPO) by a Makati regional court after former husband James Yap allegedly made overt sexual advances on her in her home and in the presence of Bimby.

Despite Yap’s petition for a hold departure order (HDO) to be imposed on mother and son, Aquino and Bimby were allowed to leave the country for Paris on Saturday, March 23.

By the way, I salute the group Anon PH for defacing her website days ago. The Internet is now a force that the old blokes must not underestimate. Those people who supported the Cybercrime Law are a bunch of idiots. Their perception of the Internet is the same as Bush termed them “Internets”. Do not forget that it is also a system of tubes!

For those people who will attack me , well you are all a  bunch of banana eating monkeys or in short, baboons who refuse to see reality because of your conformity to the stupid dogmas and the authorities. This is a comment of an idiot who don’t know how to understand the hard, painful truth.

So if the person in the TV is either GMA or Corona, you will have a justification to call them thieves? What a bunch of stupid hypocrites. That is why I became a Secular Agnostic. An example of the comment will be this:

Dami nyo alam na istorya! Ang galing nyo maghusga, ang pagtuunan nyo na lang ng pansin eh kung paano mapapaulnad ang buhay nyo! Huwag kayo manghusga pra di kayo mahusgahan!
To complete the ingredient for our meal, I shall include an article from GetRealPhilippines regarding this issue. I despised both GRP and Rappler right now but I hope that GRP has the balls for a provocative insight.
Presidential sister Kris Aquino surprised everyone Thursday night when she reportedly announced on ABS-CBN “news” program TV Patrol that she will be “resigning” from showbiz…

During a live interview with “TV Patrol,” an emotional Aquino told anchor Ted Failon that she must do what’s best for her son, James “Bimby” Yap Jr., even if it means sacrificing her lucrative career.

“I’m giving up my shows. Hindi ko sinasabi ‘yan just so that I can say na I’m the one making the bigger sacrifice. Tinatalikuran ko ang mundo na kinilala ko na bumuhay sa akin dahil higit doon sa karera ko, mas mahal ko ang anak ko,” she said.

Aquino currently has three shows on ABS-CBN: the morning talk show “KrisTV,” the primetime drama series “Kailangan Ko’y Ikaw” and the talent search “Pilipinas Got Talent,” where she sits as a judge.

Aquino explained that she wants to be able to tell her son when he grows up that she did everything for his sake.

Included amongst the surprised people, it seems, were characters one would expect would be the least surprised: “My sisters don’t know that this is what I was going to say. My lawyer doesn’t know that this is what I was going to say…” As to how long Kris Aquino will be taking leave from showbiz? Well, it is always handy to include an escape clause in one’s fits of drama: “I don’t know. I can’t speak about forever, I can speak about what’s best for my son…” As such, it really depends on Kris’s concept of exactly how long is “forever”.

The whole drama erupted after a domestic row with Aquino’s estranged husband James Yap that led to a nasty legal battle over visitation rights to their son Bimby following allegations of “psychological” abuse perpetrated by Yap against mother and son. A temporary protection order (TPO) has since been granted by a court in favour of Aquino. The order has a validity period of 30 days, but Aquino legal counsel Frank Chavez will be petitioning the court to make the order permanent.

The influence Kris wields over an electorate renowned for their beholdenness to celebrity over substance in political platform is legendary. As such, the timing of these spectacles is suspect.

This latest of media frenzies surrounding Kris comes at a time when politicians and their bankrollers are turning the heat up on the campaign effort to bag a lucrative seat in the Philippines Senate in the May 2013 elections. The Aquino clan is seemingly under intense pressure to seize control of as many branches and agencies of the Philippine government as possible to progress its goal of securing Hacienda Luisita from subjection to the Comprehensive Agrarian Reform Program (CARP).

Back in 2010, just as then candidate Benigno Simeon “BS” Aquino III was set to ascend the Philippine presidency, another media circus also erupted over a war of words between Kris and showbiz honcho Annabelle Rama and her daughter Ruffa Gutierrez. As that showbiz crisis raged, Kris also “promised” to retire from showbiz and leave the country.

Well people it’s just a publicity stunt. Damn it, we are too close to boot out that bitch from national television. If I have the power, I will exile her to Burkina Faso. Let’s see if she will be kidnapped by the militants there and have her mouth cut off.

I have made several statuses about that and I apologise for my apparent cynicism but it’s the truth. The woman is a media whore. Who has the right mind to televise it, that mundane issue that has little to do with our country and even our daily lives.

While our current band of lunatics are busy in Sabah dying in the middle of nowhere and our current band of lunatics in the clergy and our government, we are busy about that annoying twat that I would rather want to see to be executed by a Mil- 24 helicopter with a barrage of rockets and fire from machine guns. I also want her body to be crushed by a T-72 tank.

By the way, I am laughing at the people who have the balls to say that she is the model of domestic violence. Fuck them, it is an insult. Well, let’s just wait for the conclusion of this fiasco.

For a while I will play this song by the band Radiohead. All of my comments are purely satirical by the way, so fuck the people who will sue me for libel. Until then, see you on my next article! You know what? Anime makes more sense.


One comment on “Da Kris Aquino Fiasco

  1. Zabeth Pampag
    March 24, 2013

    (“I want Kris to be in Europe permanently”) Sweet bejesus, please don’t say that! I own Europe and I don’t want her to disturb my quiet life here, baka masapawan pa nya si Carla Bruni sa mga drama nya sa harap ng tv pag dito yan nakatira sa Europa!

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